You Think You’re Better Than Me?

Many years ago, my wife, Lori and I started a church in Colorado Springs, Colorado.  It went pretty well.  People came to church, people came to Jesus, things were going swimmingly.

But a group of believers connected with a para-church Christian organization started coming to church.  These folks seemed to be nice enough, studious, serious people, but they complained and judged and criticized just about everything I was doing and how the church was operating.  Their disapproval got to me.  I started second-guessing every move, I doubted myself and God, I found it difficult to exist in that atmosphere of judgmentalism.

I happened to be at lunch with my old roommate, respected Christian author and leader, Marshall Shelly.  Marshall was in town, and as we ate he asked me how it was going at the new church.

I told him lots of things were great, and that this group from that organization had started attending…when he quickly interrupted me with a casual question I will never forget.  He asked, “Do they still think they are better than everybody else?”

I was immediately freed.  I realized I didn’t need to give any more brain space to even well-meaning people who thought they were better than everyone else.

All of us can fall into the trap of believing we are better than other people.  That is our default setting as humans.  And that temptation is exacerbated by our culture.

I was raised with the sometimes not-so-subtle belief that my tribe is better than others.  I was raised Catholic and taught that Catholics are better than Protestants.  Maybe you had the opposite upbringing.  We were JFK Democrats, and it was implied that we were better than Republicans.  We were middle class and middle class are better than poor people, and better than rich people.  We thought we Irish were better than the likes of everyone else.  Notre Dame fans were clearly better than people who rooted for USC. Everyone was better than someone who rooted for USC… And on and on.

And it still happens.  Thinking that we are better permeates our lives.  Northern California is better than Southern California.  Our town is better than yours.  The U.S. is better than Canada, eh? 

Civic pride, family delight and national joy are not necessarily bad things.  But when we slip into or even double down on, “I’m better than you!” there are big problems.  The arrogance and smugness and downright selfishness dishonors others and doesn’t help anybody.

We see the evils of racism, sexism, ageism, weightism, and all sorts of isms and phobias.  We choose sides, demonize those who don’t agree with us, and our biased news sources tell us we are better than everybody else.  So how do we step out of that?

How can we stop entertaining the thought that we are better than everyone else?  A story from the book of Acts gives us an answer.

At Caesarea there was a man named Cornelius, a centurion in what was known as the Italian Regiment. He and all his family were devout and God-fearing; he gave generously to those in need and prayed to God regularly. One day at about three in the afternoon he had a vision. He distinctly saw an angel of God, who came to him and said, “Cornelius!”  Cornelius stared at him in fear. “What is it, Lord?” he asked. The angel answered, “Your prayers and gifts to the poor have come up as a memorial offering before God. Now send men to Joppa to bring back a man named Simon who is called Peter.  He is staying with Simon the tanner, whose house is by the sea.”  When the angel who spoke to him had gone, Cornelius called two of his servants and a devout soldier who was one of his attendants.  He told them everything that had happened and sent them to Joppa.

--Acts 10:1-8 (NIV)

Cornelius was a Roman centurion.  A centurion was a professional officer in charge of about one hundred men.  Centurions surely thought they were better than the Jews.  They probably viewed Jews as rebellious and difficult subjects to govern. Roman discipline valued order, and Jewish resistance would have been seen as troublesome.

“Cornelius is not just a Gentile; he is a Roman. He is not just a Roman; he is a soldier. He is not just a soldier; he is a commander. He is not just a commander; he commands the Italian regiment. You could not create a more non-Jewish person in a laboratory.”--René Schlaepfer Flawed Follower: Travels with Simon Peter: Hope for Imperfect, Inconsistent, Confused People Who Still Love Jesus

Cornelius had an encounter with God that opened his eyes.

About noon the following day as they were on their journey and approaching the city, Peter went up on the roof to pray.  He became hungry and wanted something to eat, and while the meal was being prepared, he fell into a trance. He saw heaven opened and something like a large sheet being let down to earth by its four corners. It contained all kinds of four-footed animals, as well as reptiles and birds. 13 Then a voice told him, “Get up, Peter. Kill and eat.”  “Surely not, Lord!” Peter replied. “I have never eaten anything impure or unclean.”   The voice spoke to him a second time, “Do not call anything impure that God has made clean.”  This happened three times, and immediately the sheet was taken back to heaven. --Acts 10:9-16 (NIV)

Peter was a Jew, one of God’s chosen people.  He had to think he and his people were better than everybody else, especially when it comes to what they ate.

Have you ever encountered someone who thought their diet was better than everyone else’s? 

Peter had an encounter with God that opened his eyes. 

While Peter was still thinking about the vision, the Spirit said to him, “Simon, three men are looking for you.  So get up and go downstairs. Do not hesitate to go with them, for I have sent them.”—Acts 10:19 (NIV)

The next day Peter started out with them, and some of the believers from Joppa went along.  The following day he arrived in Caesarea. Cornelius was expecting them and had called together his relatives and close friends.  As Peter entered the house, Cornelius met him and fell at his feet in reverence.  But Peter made him get up. “Stand up,” he said, “I am only a man myself.” –Acts 10:24-26 (NIV)

When Cornelius starts to revere him, Peter puts a stop to it.

While talking with him, Peter went inside and found a large gathering of people. He said to them: “You are well aware that it is against our law for a Jew to associate with or visit a Gentile. But God has shown me that I should not call anyone impure or unclean. So when I was sent for, I came without raising any objection. May I ask why you sent for me?”

--Acts 10:27-29 (NIV)

Cornelius explains about his vision.  Then Paul makes this point:

Then Peter began to speak: “I now realize how true it is that God does not show favoritism but accepts from every nation the one who fears him and does what is right.

--Acts 10:34-35 (NIV)

"God does not show favoritism"   We judge by race, status, or nationality, God is impartial. He does not favor one ethnic group over another.

This was a revolutionary idea for Peter, as Jews traditionally believed they were God’s chosen people. Peter now understands that salvation through Jesus is open to all, including Gentiles.

It was revolutionary, but it is also a clear message in the Bible:

People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”—1 Samuel 16:7 (NIV)

Stop judging by mere appearances but instead judge correctly.”—John 7:24 (NIV)

For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment… --Romans 12:3 (NIV)

How do we stop judging?  How do we resist the temptation to think we are better than anybody else?

Just like Peter and Cornelius, we need a clear encounter with God.

We don’t need more encounters with cable news or political pundits, we need an encounter with God.  It is only when we recognize how great God is and how small we are that we can rid ourselves of this ridiculous notion that we are better than everyone else.  We need an encounter with the Lord Almighty.

How do we get that encounter with God?

1.      Pray

Cornelius was a prayer.  He realized there was a God, he didn’t even know God, but he prayed.

And Peter was up on the roof praying.

Encounters typically come during or after prayer.  If we want that special meeting with God, we have to meet with God!

2.     Give

Cornelius gave generously to those in need.  There is something about generosity, about releasing what we have that opens our heart to others and to God.

3.      Act

Both Cornelius and Peter immediately acted on the instructions they were given.  Submission is an attitude; obedience is an action. 

Like those two, our instructions will probably be uncomfortable, they may seem awkward, and they might take us out of our comfort zone.

Leet Coate, in his book, “Becoming Peter” says, “Decide that nothing and no one is beneath you.  When you see that attitude in other people, it’s beautiful.  When you have to live that way, it’s challenging. But it’s how we live beautiful, humble lives that look more like Jesus’ life.  Nothing is beneath you—not cleaning up after the party, not scrubbing the toilet, not running the errands.  No one is beneath you. Not the intern. Not the person on the other side of the political aisle. Not the homeless person begging on the side of the road. Not the person who posts opposing comments on social media. No one.”

4.     Listen

In the next chapter, believers’ eyes are opened as they hear Peter recount his episode.

The apostles and the believers throughout Judea heard that the Gentiles also had received the word of God.  So when Peter went up to Jerusalem, the circumcised believers criticized him and said, “You went into the house of uncircumcised men and ate with them.  Starting from the beginning, Peter told them the whole story….” –Acts 11:1-2 (NIV)

So if God gave them the same gift he gave us who believed in the Lord Jesus Christ, who was I to think that I could stand in God’s way?”

--Acts 11:17 (NIV)

Let’s listen to God and to godly people.  Maybe God will speak to you directly.  Or maybe your encounter will come through someone else, a testimony or a story that moves you.

It is so easy to slip into an arrogant or judgmental attitude.  And it is so silly as well.

Let’s end with this: Years later Peter gave us some advice:

All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because,

“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”

Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. –1 Peter 5:5-6 (NIV)