Who Not How
A psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving an oral test. She asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?"
A young man in the rear raised his hand and answered, "A basketball coach?"
We are in the middle of March Madness, so let me ask you - what is your madness level?
We are living in stressful times. USA Today recently reported, “About 90% of Americans feel ‘high levels of stress’ at least once per week. A recent survey by Inc. Magazine cited that 62% of Americans say they’ve burnt out ,or are on the way there.
One man hit it on the head when he revealed, “I believe God has us here on earth to accomplish a certain number of tasks. Right now, I’m so far behind I will never die!”
How can we lighten our load? How can we discover peace?
That is essentially a trick question…. but we can find at least one answer in the story of Moses.
While the Israelites were wandering in the desert, Moses’ father-in-law, a man with the unlikely name of Jethro, came to visit Moses, along with Moses’ wife and kids. Evidently Moses wisely sent his family home to Daddy during all the plagues and commotion.
I suspect that every husband has a deep desire to please his father-in-law. It might be an impossible task - no one is good enough for my daughter - but we all want that approval.
And Moses has a lot to be proud of when he reports to Jethro:
“I led God’s people out of slavery, parted the Red Sea, destroyed the Egyptian army and even got water out of a rock.” He’d had a good year.
But Jethro gives the typical father-in-law reaction:
“Now I know that the Lord is greater than all other gods…”
“Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.
— Quote Source
Exodus 18:11 (NIV)
If you accomplished anything, there must be a God!
The next day is “Take Your Father-In-law to Work Day”, so Jethro tags along as Moses goes about his business.
When Moses’ father-in-law saw all that Moses was doing for the people, he asked, “What are you really accomplishing here?
Exodus 18:14 (NLT)
Other versions translate that question this way:
“What do you think you are doing?” (VOICE)
“Why are you doing this? (ERV)
“What’s going on here? (MSG)
By the way, when you ask, “What’s going on?” Or “What do you think you are doing?”, you’re actually quoting Scripture!
Yet those are great questions. We all need to pause from time to time and ask, what am I doing? What am I accomplishing? Why am I doing this?
Jethro continues:
“When Moses’ father-in-law saw all that Moses was doing for the people, he asked, “What are you really accomplishing here? Why are you trying to do all this alone while everyone stands around you from morning till evening?” Moses replied, “Because the people come to me…”
Exodus 18:14-15 (NLT)
“This is not good!” Moses’ father-in-law exclaimed. “You’re going to wear yourself out—and the people, too. This job is too heavy a burden for you to handle all by yourself. Now listen to me, and let me give you a word of advice, and may God be with you. You should continue to be the people’s representative before God, bringing their disputes to him. Teach them God’s decrees, and give them his instructions. Show them how to conduct their lives. But select from all the people some capable, honest men who fear God and hate bribes. Appoint them as leaders over groups of one thousand, one hundred, fifty, and ten. They should always be available to solve the people’s common disputes, but have them bring the major cases to you. Let the leaders decide the smaller matters themselves. They will help you carry the load, making the task easier for you. If you follow this advice, and if God commands you to do so, then you will be able to endure the pressures, and all these people will go home in peace.” Moses listened to his father-in-law’s advice and followed his suggestions.
Exodus 18:17-24 (NLT)
There are at least seven types of people described here:
1. People with problems.
These are the people who came to Moses with their issues, their disputes, their difficulties and their struggles. All of us have problems. These are the last, the least, the lost, the hurting.
2. Captains of tens (Deuteronomy suggests the term “captain” here.)
This is the role of every believer. We all have people in our front row that we are purposed to serve. Our friend Tom Mercer says we have 8-15 people in our “oikos,” our household. Jethro says we have ten.
3. Captains of fifties
These would be group leaders. These serve people who are serving others.
4. Captains of hundreds
These might be ministry leaders. They serve people who are serving the people who serve people.
5. Captains of thousands
These folks are even more removed from the front lines - pastors and leaders.
6. Moses
Moses had adopted a god complex. Moses moved from an attitude of, “I’m not your guy, God. Here am I, send someone else…” to “The whole world depends on me.” He turned into Ron Burgundy, “Do you know who I am?”
Amazingly, as Jethro lists the different kinds of people, this is the only one he criticizes:
“What you are doing is not good.”
Exodus 18:17 (NIV)
There is one other type of person in the story:
7. Wise Advisors
Suggestions:
• IDENTIFY YOUR CURRENT SPOT.
Where are you right now? Be honest.
• IDENTIFY WHERE YOU WANT TO BE BY THE END OF THIS YEAR.
Don’t stay in the “People with Problems” category for long—it is a season, not a sentence. Don’t keep playing the victim card.
• BE FAITHFUL WITH TEN BEFORE MOVING TO THOUSANDS. We don’t get to skip categories.
Jethro mentioned training:
Teach them God’s decrees, and give them his instructions. Show them how to conduct their lives.”
Exodus 18:20 (NLT)
Be honest about and faithful in the season you are in, and God will promote you in his timing.
• STOP PLAYING GOD. PLAY YOUR POSITION. The only category that is not good is the Moses complex.
Moses went from, “I’m not worthy,” to “I’m kind of a big deal” super swiftly. We don’t need any celebrity leaders, we already have a celebrity, we already have a rock star—Jesus! We’re just the roadies!
• LEARN TO DISCERN GOOD ADVICE.
We are bombarded with a crapload of advice. Everyone has an opinion; everyone has a podcast. Learn to cut through the crap! Seriously, many of us are brainwashed by the media and social media. Discover good advice. It might even come from your father-in-law.
Jethro said Moses could lighten his load and everyone could find peace.
How can we lighten our Load? I mentioned that this was a trick question. It is not a how question, it is a who question.
The best book I’ve read this year is “Who Not How” by Dan Sullivan and Benjamin Hardy.
“You must stop asking yourself, “How can I accomplish this?” That question, although common, leads to mediocre results, frustration, and a life of regrets. A much better question is: “Who can help me achieve this?”
Here is one statement that floored me:
“The originator of the Who Not How framework and primary author of this book—Dan Sullivan—didn’t write one word you’re about to read.”
Benjamin Hardy mentioned to Dan Sullivan, “You need to write a book on this who not how stuff!” Sullivan then empowered Hardy to write it.
Here is The Big Challenge:
Find a Who
Take the time to find, teach, train and empower one Who in your life to lighten your load and expand theirs. We’re living in Whoville! There are Who’s all around. Find one.
Become a Who
That’s what we do for people in our front row. We lighten their load. Find someone whose load you can actually lighten a bit.
Excel Leadership Network wants to be a Who in your life. We exist to set apart and support high level leaders who are planting churches and expanding the kingdom. Let us know how we can help you.
If we adopt the Who Not How approach, like Moses, we can lighten the load, promote peace and even reduce the March Madness in our lives.