Seen or Unseen

A couple of weeks ago Lori and I went out to dinner for our anniversary.  We picked a nice place, pretty expensive, I made reservations and everything.  When we got there the hostess escorted us to our table and told us our waiter would be right with us.  No menus, just wait for the waiter.  We waited, no waiter.  I went to the bathroom and came back, no waiter.  Another couple got seated not too far from us.  Their server came over, handed them menus, and brought them some bread.  We waited. 

 Does that sort of thing bother you as much as it does me?  Where is the fairness?

Another party got seated behind us.   When their server came over and greeted them, I could feel myself getting agitated.   We were here first.  Are we invisible?  Now, don’t let this ruin dinner. 

Finally, another server stepped into the room, and I did something I immediately regretted.  I made a hand gesture.  No, not that one.  I crossed both hands above my head to flag him down.

It worked, our waiter came over and said, “Sorry ‘bout that…”  He went to get menus and I thought, “Why did I do that?  Why is this so irritating to me?”

One of my sharpest triggers is not being seen.  Large family, parents were preoccupied.  I was overlooked.  I recently spent time with an older sibling.  For twenty-four hours they didn’t ask me one question, they just talked and talked.  Am I invisible?  No wonder being overlooked gets to me.

I want to be seen.  How many times have I felt the need to signal, “Hey, I exist!”  I don’t need to be the center of attention, actually I shy away from that, but I do want to be noticed, acknowledged, recognized and rewarded. 

And I suspect I am not alone.  I bet you want to be seen, to be noticed, to be rewarded when you do something right.  

We all want the boss to see our hard work, the teacher to see that we put in effort, the coach to know that we don’t belong on the end of the bench.  We want to be seen.

That need is intensified in today’s culture.  A recent survey asked ten-to-twelve year-olds what they want to be when they grow up, do you know what the top answer was?  “I want to be famous.”  A United Kingdom study of seventeen-year-olds revealed their top occupational goal is “YouTuber!” 

Kids want to be seen.  They want to be social media influencers, they post everything on the gram, they want to be seen.  In fact, a growing number are willing to commit devastating crimes just to be known.

 We all want to be seen.  Here’s the question:  

How Can We Deal with Our Need to Be Seen?

I want to be noticed, acknowledged, recognized and rewarded.  How can I make sure that happens?  Jesus tells us in his Sermon on the Mount:

“Watch out!”
Matthew 6:1 (NLT)

In the middle of this great sermon Jesus pauses to say, “Warning!  Heads-up!  Be careful!  This might trip you up!”

“Watch out!  Don’t do your good deeds publicly, to be admired by others, for you will lose the reward from your Father in heaven. ”
Matthew 6:1 (NLT)

Jesus says, “Don’t try to get your need to be seen met…publicly.    It will actually mess things up.”

He gives three examples.

First, when you give:

“When you give to someone in need, don’t do as the hypocrites do—blowing trumpets in the synagogues and streets to call attention to their acts of charity! I tell you the truth, they have received all the reward they will ever get. But when you give to someone in need, don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. Give your gifts in private, and your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.”

Matthew 6:2-4 (NLT)

Giving is not a spectator sport.  Don’t publicize your generosity.

Example number two, when you pray:

“When you pray, don’t be like the hypocrites who love to pray publicly on street corners and in the synagogues where everyone can see them. I tell you the truth, that is all the reward they will ever get. But when you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father in private. Then your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.”

Matthew 6:5-6 (NLT)

Praying is also not something you do for the kudos.

Jesus then pauses to give some instructions about prayer.  He presents the Lord’s Prayer as a pattern for prayer.  And before he gets back to his third example of not going out of your way to be seen, he pauses to talk about forgiveness:

“…and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us.”

“If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

Matthew 6:12, 14-15 (NLT)

Hmmm.

My need to be seen may actually be a forgiveness issue.  I need to forgive my parents, I need to forgive my siblings.  I need to forgive that lazy waiter for not seeing me.

Example number three:

“And when you fast…”

Matthew 6:16 (NLT)

How about if we extrapolate this to say, “When you serve…”  “When you help at a workday at church…”  “When you work with the kids, or do set-up or take-down, or tech or lead a group, or do something for the people in your front row…”

“And when you fast, don’t make it obvious, as the hypocrites do, for they try to look miserable and disheveled so people will admire them for their fasting. I tell you the truth, that is the only reward they will ever get. But when you fast, comb your and wash your face. Then no one will notice that you are fasting, except your Father, who knows what you do in private. And your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.”

Matthew 6:16-18 (NLT)

Jesus tells us that we don’t need to do one of these.  Yes, we all have a need to be seen, to be noticed, to be recognized, to be rewarded.  But this need is somewhat misguided.  

Did you notice the punch line that Jesus revealed three times: 

“Your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.”—Matthew 6:4 (NLT)

“Your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.”—Matthew 6:6 (NLT)

“Your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.”—Matthew 6:18 (NLT)

God sees everything, and that is a very good thing.

Typically, we use the fact that God sees everything as a warning.  He saw you do that, you going to be punished! 

But Jesus says, “God saw you do that, he saw that happen to you, you will be rewarded.”

“You are the God who sees me.”--Genesis 16:13 (NLT) 

And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.

Hebrews 11:6 (NIV)

God sees everything, and that is a good thing.  He sees you giving and praying and serving.  He sees you being overlooked—He won’t overlook you.  He sees you toiling in obscurity.  99+% of Jesus’ earthy time was spent in obscurity.  He sees, he notices, he recognizes, and that’s a good thing.  He will make it right.

Let the others have the earthly accolades, heavenly accolades are much better, and last longer.

Someone cuts in line or cuts you off?  Relax, God sees, he will reward you.

Here’s The Big Challenge:  This week give, pray and serve in obscurity.

We desperately want to be seen, and God sees us!

God sees everything and that is a good thing!