How To Loosen It Up

After church a couple Sundays ago, Lori decided to run some errands.  I went home, sat down, and turned on the Los Angeles Angel’s baseball game that I was recording.  My habit is to watch the Angels hit, and fast-forward through the opposing team’s batters.  But as I was speeding past the Seattle Mariner’s hitters, I noticed there was an interview with Angels’ manager Joe Maddon during a half-inning.  I pushed the enter button to listen.

Commentator Mark Gubicza began the interview by saying, “Hey Joe, I’ve noticed that you’ve brought a different atmosphere to the team and clubhouse this year.  You’re trying to get the guys to have fun…”   

Joe responded this way: “I’ve never done anything well with a tight butt.”

What?  I had to rewind that.  “I’ve never done anything well with a tight butt.”  He continued, “They started playing as kids who were having fun.  I know they are grown men, but why can’t they have fun playing now.”

I re-winded to hear it a third time, “I’ve never done anything well with a tight butt.” 

Thoughts of my playing days flooded my memories.  I played baseball or softball for over forty years.  Honestly, rarely did I have a good year.  I either played poorly, or I played great.  I remember one Autumn in the Bay Area where I did both at the same time.  I was playing in a twilight league on Mondays in Vallejo, and I stunk.  The sun was always setting right behind the pitcher and I’d have to hold my hand up just to see.  I was awful.  Then I would drive fifteen minutes to Benicia for a late-night league, where I hit .900.  900!  That wasn’t even the best on the team.  The lead-off batter, Jim, hit over.900!  He’d get a hit, I’d get a hit, and then the 2-, 3-, and 4th place hitters would hit a home run.  We won the city championship pretty easily.

What was the difference?  The tightness of my …well, you know.  

“I’ve never done anything well with a tight butt.”

Then I thought about ministry.  Wow!  How many pastors are not doing well because they are playing with a tight butt?

During this past year I suspect most pastors have been playing, serving and feeling tight.

By the way, I looked up “tight butt” on the “DuckDuckGo” search engine.  (I would not recommend this!.)  Here is what I found:

“The definition of a tight ____ is a person who is tense, uptight, inhibited and can't relax.”

“(slang, mildly vulgar) Someone who does not know how to have fun, or who is so worried about insignificant things as to ruin any fun that anyone around them may be having.”

“A person who is rigidly conventional.”

“A strait-laced, inhibited person.”

The question is, how can we loosen it up?

There is a story from the Book of Acts that addresses how to relax our tight glutes:

The members of the council were amazed when they saw the boldness of Peter and John, for they could see that they were ordinary men with no special training in the Scriptures. They also recognized them as men who had been with Jesus.
Acts 4:13(NLT)

You may remember the incident that started in chapter 3.  Peter and John headed to the temple one afternoon when they encountered a man lame from birth.  Peter said, “Silver and gold have I none, but such as I have give I thee.  In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth rise up and walk?”  (Did you learn that camp song?)  The man rose up, walking and leaping and praising God. 

This miracle caused a stir.  The religious leaders wanted to squelch things, so they conferred and came up with an idea:

To keep them from spreading their propaganda any further, we must warn them not to speak to anyone in Jesus’ name again.” So they called the apostles back in and commanded them never again to speak or teach in the name of Jesus.  But Peter and John replied, “Do you think God wants us to obey you rather than him?  We cannot stop telling about everything we have seen and heard.”
Acts 4:17-20 (NLT)

Peter and John were playing loose.  We might expect them to be uptight, but they weren’t.  Why not?  What caused them to not tighten?

1.  Wise Internal Leadership 

Peter and John did not allow their inner thoughts to throw them off. 

They knew who they were—men who had been with Jesus.  

They knew their role—they were not the money guys, just witnesses of Jesus.  

They knew where their authority came from—the power of Jesus healed.  

They knew their calling— obey God, not men.

Their inner life allowed them to play free.

So many people and pastors do not know their role, identity, position or calling.  No wonder they are so tight.  And guess what?  We don’t do anything well with a tight butt.

How is your self-leadership?  As coaching guru Tom Nebel says, “We never graduate from the school of self-awareness.”

2.  Wise External Leadership  

The very question asked of Joe Maddon gives us a major clue about lightening up.  It is the leader’s job to set the atmosphere that allows people to have fun playing.

This council of rulers and elders and religious leaders was doing their best to stifle the apostles. 

But Peter and John were following Jesus.

Two entities tend to suppress pastors:

A. Governing Boards 

Too many leadership councils act like the council Peter and John were encountering—they think it is their job to inhibit the leader.  

When the governance works to squeeze the life out of the leader, that poor person can’t seemingly do anything well because their rear end is clenched.

Our church government structures tend to be way more cultural than Biblical.  They are often not based on the New Testament, they are based on the United States political system, which is designed to limit power and cause gridlock.    

No wonder so many pastors are uptight.

B.  Denominations

I don’t want to say anything bad about denominations, but somebody has to be honest.  Most denominations are made up of really good people.  But these organizations can’t help but become self-centered, power-hungry, and inept.  Their primary customer is themselves.  They look a lot like political parties and labor unions; okay on paper, but so unhelpful to everyone except themselves.

The Excel Leadership Network is not a denomination.  We chose not to be one when we formed.  Our partner, Transformation Ministries is not a denomination.  TM left a denomination!  

We want to set you up for success.  We want to help you lead yourself.  We want to help you lighten up!

Our vision is to help you keep it loose.

And your job as a leader is to understand your calling, role, and power.  And to help the people you lead play loose as well.